“I am the lizard king. I can do anything.” -Jim Morrison

Once when I was a freshman in high school, my best friend walked up to me before the morning bell and said "Mr. Wood's got that damn lizard on his shoulder." Now, the fact that Mr. Wood carried a lizard on his shoulder is not essential to the story. What is essential is my reaction. I looked at her with raised eyebrows, "What did you say?" "He has that lizard on his shoulder." That's what I thought. We don't curse. We're 14 and we have no business doing such. Furthermore, we carry bibles in our backpacks and listen to TobyMac.

I don't know where along the way we began cursing, or how that lead to other things that 15 or 17 or 21 year olds have no business doing, but it did. I don't know when our friendship transitioned from "don't curse" to "don't drive tonight." It must have been somewhere around the time that I realized that I actually hate TobyMac. We took the bibles out of our bags, and when they came over the intercom and called me to the office, we exchanged 'oh shit' looks, because I definitely knew why and you were my best friend so you definitely knew why too.

Later, we both picked our bibles back up. We went to small groups and retreats together, and we certainly never did anything that Christians have no business doing. It was never a question. But circumstances change and people change and friendships change. And tonight, all that I can hope for either of us is that we'll both pick our bibles back up again and that we'll find something that really works. Something that serves as more than just a solution in the middle of an 'oh shit' moment. As far as our friendship, you have my permission to raise your eyebrows at me anytime I'm acting like I have no business acting.

As for Mr. Wood's lizard, his name was Peeve. He liked to introduce it to people as his pet, Peeve. And he always used to walk around with that dang lizard on his shoulder.

¿Donde estas mis pantalones?

"Jesus wants us to spread nice words, not mean words. We should spread nice words just like Tommy Boy!"
I question whether or not these parents monitor their kids' movie watching..

There's one particular kid that comes to camp week after week, year after year. Needless to say, we all know her fairly well. She's a bossy little brat, but somehow she manages to grow on you. This week she was not quite herself, and several people noticed it. One morning on the bus, another counselor noticed writing on her hand, so she reached out to look at it with no other intention than to engage the quieter than normal child in conversation. What she found was the number 6, drawn on the palm of her hand, the tip of her pointer finger, and the tip of her thumb. I won't lie, it was enough to freak us all out. Later, she told the counselor it was just because it was her favorite number, but it was still strange.

I do believe 100% in the spirit realm and spiritual warfare. I believe that if we could see the battles that occur on our behalf, we would be scared out of our senses. I think John Piper summed up the general belief of America best by saying this.. "Very few people think that we are in a war that is greater than World War II, or than any imaginable nuclear war. Few reckon that Satan is a much worse enemy than any earthly foe, or realize that the conflict is not restricted to any one global theater, but is in every town and city in the world. Who considers that the casualties of this war do not merely lose an arm or an eye or an earthly life, but lose everything, even their own souls, and enter a hell of everlasting torment?" Furthermore, I believe in possession (not that I think this 10 year old was). I don't really know how it manifests itself, but according to scripture, those possessed can do crazy, super-human things. I don't necessarily know that I've ever seen such. I feel that there is another more subtle type that is much more common. More of a 'demonic persuasion' if you will. I think we see this more than we would guess. It's definitely not something to play with.

I leave you with this.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNSn9EOTJ10

Yep, you win.

I've found a new iPhone app called Pen Pals. It's really quite the concept. Another step towards our incessant need to connect. But that's another theory for another time. Anyway, the point of it is this: You compose a message, making it as interesting as possible, and hit send. It goes out to several random people, and you wait to find out whether or not anyone wants to be your "pen pal" based on that initial message. For example, the first one I sent out simply asked "What's your favorite movie?" From the responses I received, I have two new friends, one from Florida and one from Germany. Days later, I decided to fish for another couple of pals. I sent out "Tell me a secret not many people know about you." Seems like everyone is secretly gay or bisexual. One such girl asked me for a secret in return. Not having many, I decided to tell her that I take anti-anxiety meds to keep me from worrying myself crazy. Nothing too exciting, but true nonetheless.

That was several days ago. Today, I received another reply from her. Here's what 'Melanie Jane' had to say: "I think I've got you beat. I'm sychophtenic (huh?) and take a handful of meds 4 times a day. I've got alot of people in my head and not all of them like me. I've got panic attacks and emotions that are on rollercoasters. I manage to work now that I'm medicated. I'm a witch and follow The Faery Craft Of Wisteria Spring. It is guided by the Celtic gods and goddesses of Ireland."
...
Oh really now? I'm not quite sure how to reply. She definitely does have me beat.

It reminds me of the time I went on a pity date with a boy from church. He took me to the ULM radio station where he worked. Later on, at about 9 PM in a soundproof room in an empty building on a deserted campus, he decided to tell me he practices Wicca. My response? "So do you have like a broom and a cauldron?" Good thing he thought I was cute or he would have definitely used his self proclaimed love spell. I did, however, find out that he can 'make it rain.' Like literally. But not really.

Oh good times with the Wiccan peoples.

Mister we could use a man Like Herbert Hoover again.

Me - Dad, how do you feel about Herbert Hoover?
Dad - Hmm. I don't know what I think about him. I don't think he was a good president.
Mom - They named a dam after him.
Dad - They don't say much about him in history. I don't think he was any good.

I'm sitting in my parents' living room tonight, trying to be around people. Summer can be a dangerous thinking time for me. I learned that the hard way, somewhere around 6th or 7th grade. But I digress. My dad is in his recliner, my mother in her chaise, an I am on the couch between them. Mom is playing a mindless game on her laptop, occasionally glancing at me, especially when I sigh. My dad hasn't looked up from the movie on his laptop in 15 minutes. This is how it is often times when I'm here. I glance back and forth, wondering why. Why do they choose this? I love my parents a lot, but their lives seem boring as hell to me. But they enjoy it. They enjoy sitting in the room together, sitting in silence. I often times wonder how they go together; I've wondered it for years. My mom tells me it's because they committed themselves to each other in front of God, for forever. So I suppose if this way works for them, then that's great. I hope I never spend my Saturday nights sitting in silence, emotionally connected only to a flip screen, a keyboard, and a set of ear plugs. Perhaps someday it will work for me too. But not today.

I came to visit them. I was under the assumption that most normal humans engage in light conversation when called upon. I was mistaken in this case. Of course, my father went through his usual list of questions.. "What did you do today?" "Have you eaten?" "Do you know how so and so did in their class? Someone at the store said they failed." But after griping about the Russian Dating Site pop-up, whistling the introductory tune to All In the Family, and muttering a few other unintelligible things to himself, he settled in for his movie.

" A good many things go around in the dark besides Santa Claus." -Herbert Hoover

:)

I got my own apartment, turned 21, had some delicious Margaritas, studied my BUTT off, took my final and made an 81 when I needed a 77, passed Level 2 theory(!!!), squeaked by with a C in Level 2 clinical, cleaned said apartment, and took several excessively long naps.

Life is good.

"You must be new.."

At the hospital this week, after spending five minutes contradicting herself on how she wanted her chair to be, an old lady asked me if it was my first day at that job. Thank you rude old lady.

fml.

Terrapene carolina

I'm sitting in the fourth floor of the library, staring out at the bayou. I should be studying. Instead, I'm watching turtles swim. Do you wonder if turtles worry? If they hurt? I watch as one big turtle, perhaps the big kahuna, slices through the muddy water. He leaves a cleared path that stays long after he has passed. As I begin to think about how we too leave a path, I watch another smaller turtle fall in line behind him. I wonder if the little turtle looks up to the big turtle. I wonder if the little turtle even sees him anymore, of if he's simply following the effects of the big turtles passing. I wonder the same for me.. for all of us really.
There's a few brave turtles in the middle of the bayou, but most stay near the shore. It's muddy and full of vines and stagnation, but it's safe. When they tire of swimming, they can rest. Some are sitting just deep enough to where they can't possibly reach the bottom. Must they work to stay afloat? That's where I'm swimming these days. Near enough to the shore to call a time out when I want, but just deep enough to where I'm still working. I feel as though maybe it's easier just to swim across than to constantly stay afloat.

A girl is sitting in a study cubby near me eating a sammich. Tehe.